03/09/2008

What ails Shahid Afridi?

Should the PCB blame the local hakkem or IPL’s cheerleaders?


Recently Shahid Afridi has been affected by the dreaded ‘garrulous’ disease, a disease that has made him unnecessarily forthcoming on IPL and Pakistani cricket.

Normally, this disease affects cricketers who are out of form and no-one is placing a bet on them making a comeback

The disease manifests as follows:

  1. The cricketer starts taking pot shots at his cricketing administration.
  2. Some resort to calling the selectors Muppets and others have even sunk to level of calling the selectors buffoons.
  3. He has visions of lucrative offers from IPL. He threatens to retire and take up the imaginary IPL offer.
  4. The cricketer starts dispensing uncalled for advice to other players and other teams.
  5. He bolsters his family man image by talking about his wife’s sacrifice.

In short, the out of form cricketer makes a nuisance of himself by rushing to the press with a load of inanities.

Thankfully, it is apparent that in Afridi’s case a less virulent version has affected him. To state the obvious, Afridi is already a contracted player of IPL and a regular member of the Pakistani national cricket team. So it is not the need to get back into the team that is making him “garrulous’.

According to the doctor’s , Afridi’s inability to play well in the IPL is the root cause. They say Afridi was a confident man when he strode to the crease, but the very sight of those beautiful cheerleaders, sashaying their ass before him turned him to soft putty. He could no longer biff a ball like the one he used to do before.

So badly was he affected that vision of those glorious ass haunted him in his sleep. Naturally, this meant he was unable to sleep. In these circumstances, a quickie would have been the solution. Unfortunately, Afridi’s wife was not with him, so he contacted a hakeem in Hyderabad. The hakeem, a reputed ass chaser himself, prescribed a pinch of opium.

As we all know opium is addictive, accentuates ones self-worth, and fuels brotherly love and doctor’s say that this brotherly love is driving Afridi to make these statements.

The PCB has stepped in and has referred Afridi to a reputed head shrinker for treatment.

However, can you help the PCB fix whether the culprit it is the hakeem or the cheerleaders?

(Image by diceliving.)






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7 comments:

Gaurav Sethi said...

ott - no matter what afridi does or say, he has nothing to lose. guess he knows, no inspiration or runs to be had unless someone takes his bait, beats the hell out of him - and then he can get all fixated on a non-existent vendetta

straight point said...

today he spit venom at malik too...guess insecurity is driving him crazy...

he is no longer wanted in pak...and soon we will see he will fade away from IPL...if not already...

here are my two cents on afridi way back on april in the form of joke...

http://straightpoints.blogspot.com/2008/04/afridi-joke.html

Viswanathan said...

NC,

Yep. He is making an ass of himself.

Anonymous said...

Ott, you've hit a Sehwagian-over-the-slips-hook shot for six with that post!

Doubtless Afridi has made a fool out of himself. Will Yuvraj be next? ;)

Anonymous said...

When you become a religious fanatic, you start behaving like Afridi is doing now. He's nothing but a mad dog. Ignore him.

Viswanathan said...

VMM,

Thanks for appreciating the post.:)

Why don't you write one on Yuvi?

Viswanathan said...

Philip,

Ignored.:)